Wedding Etiquette Tips – For The Mother Of The Bride!!

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The Mother of the Bride

Don’t be a Momzilla!!!!

The #1 goal for the mother of the Bride (M.O.B) is to make sure that her daughter’s wishes are carried out. The M.O.B. is often as
enthusiastic and excited as her daughter about the upcoming wedding. She may want to involve herself in each aspect of the wedding to ensure that your wedding day really is the best day of your life. This does not mean that they can dictate what happens,
but rather should ensure that what DOES happen is what the Bride wants. There are several duties that may be performed by the Bride’s mother if required.

As one of the most important role players, here are some of the M.O.B’s responsibilities:

Assisting with Wedding Planning:

If the Bride would like her help, the M.O.B. should assist the Bride in finding the perfect wedding gown, including undergarments and accessories. Remember to put the Bride’s tastes first when helping her choose her dream dress.

The M.O.B. may also assist her daughter in the arrangements like choosing accessories and attire for other wedding party members such as flower girls and pageboys.

Select the M.O.B’s own wedding outfit. The M.O.B. should select her wedding dress first, then immediately tell the mother of the groom, the M.O.G., what style and color it is so that she can match or coordinate hers. The dresses should complement each other, as well as the bridal party’s attire, but they don’t have to match. Consider the overall look of the bridal party and parents during photographs when choosing wedding attire and in particular the length of the bridal party, M.O.B and M.O.G’s dresses.

Tips for choosing M.O.B wedding attire:

In most cases, for a formal wedding, the M.O.B. and the M.O.G. should be in floor length or tea-length dresses. Dresses with a semi-formal or formal style allow for a bit of creative flair, but should still compliment the style of the wedding party and each
other.

Unless the wedding party is dressing in black the M.O.B. and M.O.G should avoid this color for their dresses.

Remember to finish off the dresses with a corsage or small bouquet that is in step with the Bride’s and the Bridesmaids.

Collaborating with the grooms parents and Father of theBride, the M.O.B is to help formulate the reception guest list.
These suggestions can then be passed onto the Bride and groom, whom after adding their friends will invite family
friends and guests from that list.

Along the way, continue to keep the groom’s parents informed of wedding planning progress, involving them in the planning to help make them feel part of the wedding. Help select and send out the invitations with the Bride. If the Bride’s mother is hosting the reception (paying the bill) she will generally be the RSVP contact and will receive replies from wedding invitations. If the Bride and groom are paying and hosting the event they can receive the replies.

The M.O.B. can help to determine the budget for the wedding, particularly if she is paying for any large part of the event such as the reception. However, she must be careful not to try to influence too much of the choices being made unless this is the case. If the M.O.B. is paying for the wedding, she needs to make sure the Bride and groom are sticking to the budget.

Increasingly these days, the Bride and groom are paying for the majority of a wedding and in this case should have the final say. In this case, if the M.O.B and Father of the Bride offer to give some money to the Bride and Groom, this money needs to be given with no strings attached.

The M.O.B should assist the Bride with the seating plan especially assisting with where to place those family members or friends that do not get along with other guests.

The Maid of Honor can also help if the M.O.B. isn’t available.

If the M.O.B is hosting the reception, she may attend planning meetings also. It is helpful to organize a staff member from the service provider to attend the planning meetings and help execute the Bride’s vision for the day.

The M.O.B can help make sure the venue is very clear about the family’s expectations for the ceremony and reception. Attend wedding rehearsals with the Father of the Bride (F.O.B.) and guests.

Attend pre-wedding parties (engagement, showers, etc). Along with the Father of the Bride, arrange to meet friends and family that are arriving from out of town, help to take care of them and ensure their visit is a smooth one. Once the wedding and reception venues are chosen, the M.O.B. can investigate nearby accommodation and help out of town visitors arrange places to stay. If she is not familiar with the area she can get advice from the wedding/reception venue, they would be used to being asked for this sort of
information.

Helping Out On the Wedding Day:

The M.O.B. can assist with giving directions during the wedding ceremony if the Bride would like help.

Help the Bride with her dress and veil on the day if the maid of honor is happy to let her.

Carry an emergency kit in case anything is needed by the Bride’s or groom’s party on the day (the maid of honor can
do this instead if the mom wants).

Be the last seated before the ceremony begins. Light the wedding ceremony candle with the Mother and Father of the Groom if a candle ceremony is taking place.

Sign the marriage register and walk back up the aisle with the Father of the Bride.

Leave for the reception after the Bride and groom.

The M.O.B and the Reception:

If the Mother of the Bride is fitting the bill for the reception then that makes her the hostess as well!

Stand next to the Groom in the receiving line at the reception and greet the guests as they arrive at your gala event.

The M.O.B has the opportunity to mingle with guests and introduce people to each other while making sure everything is going smoothly. Check things are running to plan at the reception, meals are coming out on time etc. Ensure the Bride is well supported throughout the night by her bridal party. Appoint one of the Bridesmaids to keep an eye on the staff and make sure they are fulfilling their duties for the Bride.

If the Bride needs some help, the M.O.B can assist her with changing out of her wedding dress if she has an another outfit for their send off from the reception. The M.O.B can be a big help if she takes the gown home with her if the Bride is leaving straight from the reception for the honeymoon.

Ensure the wedding reception entertainment, florists, drivers and other service providers are paid adequate tips if this is appropriate.

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